Banned from the teleprompter: #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay

The narcissist in chief loves to hear himself speak — preferably with a mirror or other reflective surface nearby. Even gaffe-tastic blunders are OK as long as he can hear the oh-so-dulcet tones of his own voice.

But there are plenty of phrases that aren’t likely to spill from President Obama’s yap in this lifetime. Luckily we have Twitter to catalog the #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay.

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "It's not Bush's fault!"—
Greg Worzel (@GregWorzel) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "I'm giving up class warfare for Lent."—
Josh Painter (@Josh_Painter) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay 2+2=4—
DefendWallst (@DefendWallSt) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay I loved "Culture of Corruption."—
Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) February 26, 2013

@michellemalkin – #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay – "That's none of my business."—
Jim Williams (@Hiraghm) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "no, that would be an abuse of power."—
Ben Howe (@BenHowe) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay I don't need that Teleprompter turn it off.—
Michael Moon (@Moondizog) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay i will not play another round of golf until I find out who attacked our embassy in Benghazi—
mvw (@mvwillbanks) February 26, 2013

Maybe I shouldn't go play golf today #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay—
Matthew Gallagher (@_MattGallagher) February 26, 2013

"I don't think YouTube has that kind of affect on people," #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay—
Adam Locascio (@adamlocascio) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay The sequester was my idea and I am responsible for the consequences.—
ConservativeCanadian (@rjfitz66) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "We have a spending problem."—
(@NRCC) February 26, 2013

@michellemalkin "Wish I could take credit for that, but I can't." #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay—
Jason Gary (@jasongary) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay My thoughts and prayers are with Chris Kyle's family, he was an American hero.—
Olivia Adams (@oliviaa_adams) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay You have the right to keep as much of your hard-earned money as possible.—
Bethany Bowra (@BethanyBowra) February 26, 2013